You Deserve Ease
To all my challenge junkies, I hear you. I see you. We need to chat.
There are so many awesome, fun, and healthy ways to challenge yourself.
Learn to code. Go rock climbing. Bake a soufflé that Mary Berry herself would fawn over!
Now, what are some challenges it’s okay to revaluate?
Let’s explore a few options:
1. Work can be easier than it’s been so far
If you grew up with parents or caregivers that worked themselves to the bone, it is OKAY if you’ve been able to find an easier path. As an immigrant, I can tell you this was (and still is) a bear I wrestle often.
Maybe your work isn’t manual labor, doesn’t last 14+ hours, or isn’t as hard as work is for someone else in your family. That doesn’t mean that the work you do isn’t valid. You didn’t sell out.
And if you continue to do work that’s just as hard or harder than previous generations, you can choose to look for an easier path. This change might have extra steps for you than for folks who were born into a life of ease and privilege, but it is possible and you deserve to give yourself a chance at something better.
Another option is to reframe your current job. Does everything about it truly suck (and you should actually find a new one), or have you accidentally gotten pulled into the workplace complaint vortex and forgot all the things you love about your job?
And maybe things are temporarily harder, but you’re working toward a goal that will give you long term ease. Remember that this isn’t permanent, and see where you can delegate, ask for help, or prioritize what’s truly important so you have room to breathe.
By choosing to let go of the decision that work has to be challenging, you allow your subconscious mind to look for easier solutions to everyday problems.
2. Change can be easier than you think
Where are my Tauruses? We just love change, don’t we?
(That was a joke. My hubby is a Taurus and we both know how stubborn people and change aren’t exactly best friends.)
I used to think that making any change in my life meant I’d have to go into overdrive, which is kind of like when you wake up on Sunday and your house is a mess and you kind of black out and then it’s suddenly 7pm, everything smells like lavender Fabuloso, dinner’s ready and you’re ready to pass out.
I’ve come to understand that I don’t always have the energy to go into overdrive, and that the best change is a habit, not a one day ass-hauling sprint. I invite you to find a little tiny thing you can start doing every day and check back in a month or two to observe how your tiny habit has made a big change for you.
There are also wonderful Neuro linguistic programming (NLP) techniques that remove the obstacles we typically face when building new habits. If that’s lights you up, look into working with a coach.
3. Time can be easier to manage
It blows my mind how many planners, journals, and coffee mugs out there say “I’m busy.” In case no one told you, being busy is no longer a signal of success (also, why was it ever? But I digress…).
If you need more time in your life to do something inspiring and/or important, do this:
Decide what single thing is your top priority.
• Write it down.
• Write down why it is more important than anything else in your life right now.
• Write down why it needs to happen now and what beautiful things will transpire if you do.
Track where you’re spending your time. Redirect time you spend watching TV, scrolling through social media, commuting, waiting in line, etc. to your new focus.
Ask your friends/family/network/etc. to take something off your plate so you can have more time for that very important activity.
TAKE ACTION:
Whether you come from the school of hard knocks, you’re a performance junkie, or you got caught up in the hustle porn on social media, it’s a good idea to check in with yourself.
Ask yourself these questions:
Is there anything I’m making truly hard on myself that doesn’t need to be?
Are there alternative ways of upping my stamina or improving my skills?
What part of my family history is encouraging me to push myself this hard? What would happen if I approached things differently?
Am I making the most of the time I have in each day, or are my mental loops controlling me?
What are some loops I’d like to rewrite?
Where can I seek support while working through these ideas?
